Return to Sender

The recent lawsuit brought by Nebraska Senator Ernie Chambers has been thrown out of court because the defendant has no known address and was not adequately notified. The defendant is not homeless, as one might expect, but rather owns many mansions in a pearly-gated community, all connected by streets paved with gold. Yes, Chambers has sued...the Lord Almighty.

Chambers, an Independent and 38-year veteran of the Nebraska's unicameral legislature (interesting) and short-sleeved sweatshirt/Sanford and Sons enthusiast, claims that God "has made terroristic threats against the senator and his constituents in Omaha, inspired fear and caused 'widespread death, destruction and terrorization of millions upon millions of the Earth's inhabitants,'" says the Associated Press.

So it appears that Nebraskans entertain themselves by continually electing to the Senate the man who sits outside the 7-Eleven. For 38 years! I guess watching someone attempt to sue the Alpha and Omega is more exciting than watching corn grow.